Tag Archive: state of mind


How many times have you heard the phrase „life is now“?

What have you done about it?

The strange thing about people is that they somehow bealive that they will live forever. They sure act that they will! How do I mean, you ask? It`s simple – how many times lately, now be honest, have you refused to go somewhere, to do something, for stupid reasons like your favorite show on the tv, cleaning of your house, or for some deeper issues like fear or shame of something?

I don`t how about you but my guiding star was my neighbour.

At the time, my life was turning around work, after which I found thousands excuses not to go or to do all that I could. I was always tired, in a dull relationship, avoiding the tray of life beause or the offred event was not too interesting, or the presented acivity was too demanding, or something was too expensive, or even on some things I haven`t been present  `cause I was too cynical to admit that maybe I could have fun or learn something there.

But then one day I met my neighbour. She was in the middle of a wedding rush, preparing the big event with the guy she met 2 years ago. She was deeply in love and full of sparks. This is the guy that really suits her, she said, and she is happy as she can be! Oh she is having so much fun! They are constantly mingling around, going on theatre shows, movie shows, concerts, exhibits, lunches, dinners, parties, dancing clubs, at least once a week they are going on short trips in the area, they are taking romantic walks every single day no matter how`s the weather… And she loves it!

I was happy for her. I really was.

But some other thing bothered me – she made me feel stupid, lazy, limited, arogant and God knows what more!

Why? Because she was 77, that`s why!!!

Can you imaggine it? I, in my peak, was drowning in almost complete lack of activities, chronical discontent, picky to the highest level and always with a ready excuse why I won`t do something or go somewhere. Almost nothing was „my thing“.

Oh yes, we were „engaged“ too, but with work and those pityful goings out every weekend to our usual club (pour respectable amount of alcohol in urself and suffer the next day), 2 or 2 drinks after or coffee after work, or with spending the evening in front of tv. Ain`t life great? Aaaaaah!

And they, in their late 70s, both with the advancing arthritis, heart problems, and all those „lovely“ gifts given to them sincerly by their age, THEY were running around like 2 kids, with their eyes wide open and a smile on their faces, enjoying every sound, taste, sight, wondering around on every meadow they saw and steping in every fresh river they could.

And me… I was… I realized I was hopeless like a Somalian trading policy!

Boring?!? What is „boring“? Complete lazyness, that`s what it is! A total and shameful resistance to every idea, change or activity!

They were not old, I was!!!

I was the senior citizien, not them, I was completly and comprehensively geriatrisited!

I had two choices: or to wait the retirement, hoping to be as vivid as she is, or to move my lazy selfish ass and start living as I should.

I chosed the second solution. After all, who knows what will happen in another 40-50 years..

`Cause this today`s pensioners are not like they used to be. They are some ****** competition!

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When we are small the world is a fascinating place. Every plane that flyes through the sky, every snowflake which lands on our palm, every found treasure even if it`s a ordinary plastic bead on the road, seems incredible. Then they convince us that we have to be practical, serious, with both feet on the ground, without too much dreams. They teach us to dissect every information, dismiss unecessary decorations and leave just useble facts. Forget the wings, forget the magic powder, forget the colorful clouds made for jumping. Do not dream.

Welll bleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeh! Magic exists!

Oh yes, I saw it last night! Me and dozens of other people. Dozens of grown up serious people. Really. Not some dreamers or lunatics but some responsable and often sceptical, cynical people.

In this town exists a man. He`s not exceling in any way. He doesn`t wears a pointy hat, long gray bear, or shiny cloak. He doesn`t hides a crystal ball, not even a bag with mysterious ingrediants and he doesn`t mumble words of some strange language in his chin. But from time to time he draws a magical stick. And then the Time stops. And the people around him. Because what he does is a real bonified magic! He is a glassblower. And what a glassblower!

The shapes that materialize from his flame, breath and stick are truely unbealivable. Every piece is carefuly shaped, every incredibly tiny detail is pulled with fantastic care. From thin air, in front of our very eyes mystical creatures from ancient tales are arising, but also some modern dreams of today`s hidden dreamers, even the ones which are carefuly cloacked from others big serious people. And they are all perfect. They are here but not quit.?? You see them but somehow dreamy. And they are becoming your personal prism through which you see the world.

But the thing that truely makes him a wizard is the power to make you a child again. I appreciate his skill but I enjoy more in observing the people around him. This, up till know, serious, hasty, grinned and worried people, are now small children which stand speechlessly and watching him with shiny and widely opened eyes. And they are really standing for half an hour, sometimes even a whole hour, sighing, smiling, ocassionaly looking at each other with true joy on their faces. Have you seen that? Heeeeeeeeeeeeey! This is…. fantastic!

And it is. The thing he does and what he does to you. Magic. From the fingers and the breath of a real wizard. So do not bealive to those evil witches which tell you the opposite. `Cause they are laying. The magic exists and you are still a child.

The fascinated and amazed joyful child which bealives in miracles. I know, I`ve seen it with my own eyes. Have you?