Tag Archive: idiot


Don`t be an idiot

I know many people.

And every time when I think that I have seen it all, something somehow still may surprise me. Like for example, I was always wondering why do the manufactures put those silly warning labels on their products…until I actually met that…hmmm…interesing individuals that are not an urban legend. They do exist and yes, they really need that warnings.

 

Like the one on deep-frozen food. You know, it says something like „After defrosting bake for 5 minutes“. Which is common reason for most of the people. I mean, you won`t just defrost it and eat it, it is still raw for crying out loud! That is, you would think so… Some – won`t. I met a creature that actually ate it like that and declared „…well…it wasn`t sooooo good like they say…it was somehow…sluggish..“. Of course it was sluggish, it was RAW!!! When I asked her didin`t she at least see the warning, she said „Why? Who reads that?!?“.

Then you have that incredible warning on the iron. There you may read: „Do not iron clothes on body“. I mean, WHO irons clothes on himself?!? Well someone does. I`ve seen it with my own eyes. And she is not affraid of getting her skin burned, or thinks that it is stupid. Au contraire, she says that it is a very practical move. Ha!

But the thing that really got me thinking is the Cesar Millan show. There you may see the dog whisperer restraining various best friends, curs, bitches and doggies. In the show, on almost every „action“ scene you may read „Do not try this at home without professional help“ or something like it. And? I wonder how many people have taken this advice?

You see, I like dogs very much, but I never trust them 100% (this one goes for the people too). I don`t because every living creature can be pretty agressive and irrational when it feels insecure. With people it is manifestated on various ways, but dogs – they bite. Hard.

And they have the proper equipment too (except in the situation of doggy geriatric case, caused mostly by the tones of eaten kibbles during the years, these dogs suck, literally). And now you have, after the seen show, many venturesome heads, totally fascinated (and infatuaded, if I may say) who think that this is easy-peasy. Ha, piece of cake! Is that all that I have to do? So this means that all I have to do, when I meet an agressive dog, is to crouch, look to the ground and  reach my hand towards the dog! Isn`t this great or what! Fantastic!Simply…

People like this do not even think on the probable epilogue, that is on „I-crouch-reach-my-hand-and-finish-without-it“. Or the „I-crouch-and-the-sweet-little-rottweiler-jumps-on-my-throat“. How adorable! Ha!

 

And for that reason, I am thinking about a new educational campaign called „Don`t be an idiot!“. The targeted individuals would be all that overconfident types for which the game of  cerebral marbles is just too damn hard. The slogans would be „No, you really can`t do it“, then „You are not brave, you`re an idiot“ and „Only for the ones with the valid health insurance“.  Only then some of the ambitious will maybe stop BEFORE providing traumas to it`s family and friends. Before the story ends with stitches or that horrible solution  of dog putting to sleep. For some idiot`s fault, of course.

 

So this is why, in the Cesar Millan fashion, I whisper: ….look into my arm……..feel my energy…..this is not for you…this is not for you……….you are not the dog whisperer, you are number 87 in the emergency room....

 

Because we (and dogs) deserve it, vol. 23.

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TV… such a powerful media. Everyone is watching it. Long, long time ago, on the television you could see only the ones who really had „something“ – good actors, giornalists, singers… Now, with all this reality shows and talk shows, everyone may get a chance to be on it. And some of them are really using it. Big time.

Some people would do anything just to have their own 5 minutes of fame. Even if they reveal to the world that they are peeping through te keyhole while their mother-in-law  takes a shower. Or that every now and then, they stick a corncob into their ass.

So that someone may say to them: „I`ve seen you last night on TV!!!“

They don`t mind the fact that they will completly lose their dignity and that they will probably spend their whole life labeled as freaks, sickos, perverts, or however they have presented  themselves to the world.

But nevermind, because the star is born.

To be honest, the „star“ had some… unpleasent feedbacks, because his wife left him after the show, his mother run off crying from the studio, his friends won`t answer his calls and his CEO manager called his boss demanding to fire the idiot first thing tomorrow morning.

While the „star“ is still blinking blankly with the stupid smile on his face. He fucked up his lfe but that information still haven`t arrived to his small brain. The only thing that echoes in his head is „…you`re a star, you`re star, you`re star…look ma`, I`m on the top of the world!“

I really wonder if those idiots heard the moron alarm while they were applying into the show, or at least when they were entering into the studio, to same alarm which would alert them that they are just about to the most stupid thing in their life? Or maybe, the narcissistic dose that they own, is so strong that it practically blinds all that is inteligent and emphatic in them, in the same time forgetting what shame and damage will it bring to themselves and their closed ones?

And let`s not kid ourselves – it doesn`t have anything to do with the money. The money is just an excuse.

And the measuring unit. Of the true fact – how much they appreciate their most valuable: dignity, selfrespect, family and friends.

They are there because they want to be somebody.

Even if that somebody is the biggest idiot in the country.