Tag Archive: friendship


I feel it. It`s happening again…

Still don`t have any tactile proof but all requirements are here.

First to introduce myslef – I am Aqua, an ex notorius troublemaker alibi.

Want to escape from your one and only, every now and then, to get wasted so much you can barely walk, come home at completly unapropriete hour, and still get away with with it?

Then blame it on me!

It`s easy, just say „I was with Aqua“ or „I run into Aqua and you know how she is, she won`t let you go after only one drink…“. There, everything solved. Just like that.

How it works? Simple, get loved, or just liked even, by your friend`s best half, get her/his trust as a decent well-behaved person but who likes to go out much and whenever you feel to break up your daily routine and get a little impish – come home and say you were with me.

Yes, you will make me curse you for a while because I really don`t want to remember all those dates when I was supposed to be partying with you, but I am your favorite and always efficient alibi. Your best half knows you won`t get in any trouble because I like pure clean fun. I will dance, lough, talk and have a drink or two…(or 3, 4, 5…:-p). But that`s it. No funny buisness.

 

No, really, few years back, I was going out much, didn`t have so much responsabilities, and you could meet almost everywhere. In clubs, concerts, bars, somewhere miles from civilisation just walking and admiring the nature, …Well, the last one I still do but partying… Let`s say that now you may see me in a club 3-4 times tops per a year, having a cup of coffee in a nice cozy place and sometimes you may see me on those few interesting exhibitions you may find. Not a perfect alibi maker anymore.

Yes, I was following Lenny Kravitz`s state of mind with that „dancing till dawn“ and I was using it the best way I could. (I was always joking with my One and only that he doesn`t knows how to go out and that I don`t know how to come home when I do). But, like I said, I had it and now I enjoy the calm harmony.

 

But…yesterday I got a message on FB from a friend of me, qouting „We have to talk, in private“. I know that she`s been going out solo for past few months, because her spouse was working, was tired, didn`t feel like partying…. And when I asked her, few days ago, when I can expect the two of them to come and see our new shiny apartment (let me brag a little) she started to shrik in a way letting me know, between the lines, that we shouldn`t contact or see her best half for now. Which is strange because her lovely Mr.D is somehow introvert and the two of us are almost the only people he wants to spend time with. Hm…

 

Me don`t likey. Don`t get me wrong, I am the first who will tap someone`s shoulder for doing something good for him/herself no matter what the rest of the world will think but this.. Looking it from the perspective of these few months, I kinda got a feeling that she has done, or doing, something really wrong. And I won`t surely be a part of that. I like that man, he is a good quality man, which I would reccomend to any woman. He is kind, romantic, strong, funny and she can always count on him. Best example: she knows to get crazy with shopping clothes and the thing makes him smile, just because it makes her happy. Now how often you meet that kind of man?!?!?

 

After all these years, I`ve come to conclusion that we shouldn`t do anything which we can`t tell our best halves. If we can`t, then we know that it will hurt that somebody, which is just wrong. (lying or deceiving is not an option for me, it takes too much energy and I really like to feel free, not tangled in anything). Or even worse, if you can`t tell it to your best half, maybe you are deceiving yourself, spending your time with a person which is clearly not for you. Don`t know which is worse.

 

So, now I am expecting. Will she or will she not ask me to cover her. Me, the troublemaker`s alibi. And I hope that she won`t. I hope that she will come out with the truth.

 

Because I (and everyone else) deserve it, 39.

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Bloody internet. You can not hide even if your life would depend on it!

Have lots of people in my life, some I met in elementary school and still enjoy spending time with them, some have enchanted me recently,  I still go out and socialize, then there are some lovely people that I had the honour and pleasure to get to know through the internet… What can I say – yes, I love people and I need the socialisation!

One of the things that I don`t need is „Hook up again with the persons you`ve lost contact with“. A-a. Hell no! If I wanted them here, I wouldn`t lose them in the first place! Don`t get me wrong, it`s not like we had some serious fights, it`s just that we took other paths for different interests and affinities. And as far as I see it, it is good that we have.

But…something have found me.

Something from the ancient past, something that I didn`t like even then when it was present, because even at that time we were too different. Fortunately that something have fallen in love and flew far far away! Aaaaah, how beautiful…it was. Now she`s back. And she wants to renew the contacts…. Dirty… mother…son of the…penetration!!! There!

Sooooooo, not to be too judgemental, hoping that maybe, just maybe, she have changed through the years I clicked „Yes“ on her friend request. Yeeeees, big mistake….

Anyhow, there I was – stalking. (yes, that is stalking, a milder type, but still) Reading her profile and her preferencies. And I saw that she is playing the same role, same old cheap movie playing in her head. Nothing happened in the meanwhile: no epifanies, no desire for upgrading, no need for a change.

Except one thing – she have obviously developed a Zsa Zsa Gabor syndrome. Seriously. She turned getting married into a hobby. And damn, is she emotional! Her corny statuses are literally sputtering from the screen, crying „Dark is the star under which I was born“ or „Oh, misery, my loyal companion“, she is a member of all the prominent groups like: „You call me a whore when I give and when I don`t“, „All the ones that are trashing me just don`t know me well“, „All men are heartless dicks“,  „I am better then her and you`ll be sorry when you finally see it“ and my personal favorite „Love to drink but then I think of you“….or something like it.

Yes. So mature, so profund, so… who makes that groups anyway?!?

The problem with people like this is that you can`t use some subtle approaches like „Coffee? Sure! But not today.You know, deadlines, my apartment is a mess, I still haven`t fed my cat…..Oh, not now, I am sending help to Pakistan and you know the crowd in the post office… I got to run! To a protest in Japan! Bastards are messing with the whales again.… You can`t, because they don`t give a damn. They want to go out with you and talk about themselves, not even thinking about who is the person sitting in front of them. They just don`t see, don`t hear and don`t care.

Damn the social networks! And Google too! How in the world she have found me?!? I`m not signed under my real name, we don`t have any mutual friends…How? Jesus!

And for that reason, from the vampires of our ancient past, and the preservation of our healthy CBC, we should have a new option – Google stake. You click on it and puff! The bloodsucker is gone! For eternity.

So, this is what I want, such a „button“. Let her drink blood to somebody else.

Are you sure you want to Google staking this person?

Yes, I`m bloody sure!

When we are small, making new friends comes as easy as breathing. We see the other kid playing and without any thinking we run towards it. And this is it – we have a new friend.

As the years pass by, they teach us what is decent, acceptable, desirable and what isn`t. With all that informations, and corrections, in our head we continue dashing through life.

Now let`s take a very common example: you are a woman in the best years of your life. You are not a small brat anymore and hell, you are miles away from becoming a biddy!  With great passion, you will claim to anyone that you just love people, going out and general mingling. But, you are lonely, very lonely. Most of your friends are married with children or in some other serious relationships with plenty of „time-eaters“. That`s why you`re nagging and whining how you don`t have anyone to go out with and your daily social coffee cups have become very, very rare.

So you are sighing.

It is sooooo hard.

To be alone like this. And you can`t stop yoursef „moaning“ to so called friends how they are neglecting you. For their important everyday „obligations“. Every now and then you shed a tear.

Poor little me. Sniff.

Nobody loves me. Sniff, sniff.

I am so…so..nice and I am all alone. Sniff, sniff, sniff.

IS THERE ANY LOVING IN THIS ROOM????? Booooohooohoooaaaaaa!!! Tears are dropping, saturating those cold, hostile walls of solitude.

Bollocks.

We have few very strong enemies and they are self-pity and laziness. That`s right. And don`t even try to use the „…but I`m not like that! I just…“. Yeah right…Cut the crap. Every now and then, all of us have been playing that role. And then we blamed everyone else. `Cause we are soooo great and the others can`t see it. Aha. Think again.

OK, people are connecting, bounding and linking. And after some time, they do things which are taking them in some other direction from yours. For that reason, they often leave from your mutual world, some physically and some emotionally. Which leaves you… Playing the martyr. Alone…miserable…left by everyone…with nobody around…

Well move your lazy butt! Look again. There are literally tons of good, high quality people with who you can mingle and become friends. But they need some effort too, you should offer a part of you. For crying out loud, even if you are the shyest creature in the galaxy, now in our time, we have like a zillion social networks – bless the internet, where you can meet so many people to blow your mind.

But company and familiarzing alludes interaction, giving-taking, listening, effort, thinking…a that present a Greek drama, does it? It is too hard probably.

Nothing has changed. You can still approach the other child, offer it a ball or a doll asking: „Wanna play with me?“. Because everyone has it`s favorite toy, material one, intelectual or emotional, which he/she can share with another person.

The main advantage is that you don`t have to yell like crazy under someone`s window asking: „Mrs.Jones, can Linda come out and play?“.

So take your best, your worst, all that makes you special as you are, and share it. Your future friends are tapping in expectation.