Tag Archive: freedom


Happy end

Discontetment has been long. Actually, almost from the beginning. As soon as that initial passion has disappeared , it`s place was taken by the frustration and the feeling of a huge mistake. But there were the children, and the decency, for which those real, sincere and thrutful words were never spoken.

So it lasted for years. Until one lovely Christmass and a carefully prepared dinner. The guests came around 8 that evening, at 8:30 the dinner was served and suddenly at 9 the phone rung. The wife have picked up and… Well, well, well, on the other side she heard her husband`s mistress. Ha!

The wife have given the phone to the husband and waited patiently until the conversation was finished. Then he asked: „What now?“ and the wife calmly responded „Nothing. Now we are going back to our guests and finish the dinner like civilized people. After it, be so kind to pack up your things and leave. And I mean tonight, please. I don`t know and I am not interested where you are going to go. Shall we?“…..

So, the guests left at midnight. He have, still not bealiving, packed his things, stepped out of the house, entered into the car and sitting there for at least half on hour. For crying out loud, I mean really – where should go the one which is leaving his home and family on the Christmass eve?!? In the middle of the night?!? Really!

And her? Well…First she sat down in the kitchen and made herself a cup of coffee. The sipped it slowly, carefully placing all the fresh received puzzles in her head. And then, she have suddenly jumped on her feet and opened a bottle of wine. Hey, it`s finished! It is really over! No more! No more of him, of anguish, misery and the frustration. She should thank the Allmighty that his lover actually called tonight. OK, maybe it is a little peskily, it is Christmass, but still…. Freedom, choice, relief…Finally!

The woman has been partying till the dawn.

 

And there I am, listening the story and hardly bealiving. But I have no choice because the same thing has been told by the Finally-deliberated-wife and her daughter. „And, have you ever regretted?“ – I ask politely. „Not a chance!“ – she says, „from that  day 23 years have passed. 23 years of pure bless and happiness!“. I`m sitting silently, thinking about it and then the „kid“, which now is in her mid 30s, starts to lough – „From that day, mom is a completly new woman. And we are all feeling better.“. To hell with it, I just can stop and I must ask: „Did she really celebrated?“. The „Kid“ bursts into loughter again- „Celebrated? She was singing until 6 a.m.!“.

What about him’“ – I bodger, „what happened to him?“. The Finally-deliberated sighs and says: „Aaaaah…poor guy. I`m afraid he is not at the top for years now. Soon after that…hap, the things between him and his…girlfriend have finished, to be more precise – she left him. His carieer has gone down the drain, every now and then he finds some short-term work and this is it. Oh, he comes by, every now and then, asking for a buck or few, and leaves.“

 

There. Just to be able to say that being bored on somebody`s wedding and stuck with the people I don`t know isn`t always a  drag. You may hear incredible stories. Thinking about it, that awful divorce may bring a true Renaissance. It starts like a Greek tragedy but it finishes as a pastourelle.

 

Because sometimes you do get what you deserve, 23.

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I am having a serious conversation. With a 8 year old child. A girl, to be more precise. Which is stirred, not shaken. Anyhow, she would like to know something, but then again maybe she wouldn`t, maybe it would be better for her to don`t know….SPIT IT OUT KIDDO!!! – I go  sympathetically and tactfully. „Uhhhhhhhhh“, says the kid, „Aaaaaaahm… how the babies are made?“. Ha! So she got me thinking how to explain sex to a child without provocing any trauma with all that pushing, flexible holes, self-willing swelling parts and cetera. And all of the sudden, here it comes my Loving one with a book in his hands named „Sexual education for 7-9 year old children“. Gift from above….. And I will adore and kiss your steps, won`t take ever your name from my lips….Give it! Right now!

So, we discovered that the one who`s name we shall not speak (and it`s not Prince/sign or Voldemort) but the one we call Mhhhhhmmmmm-thingy, boys use primerly for peeing, Ha ha ha, he he he, silly boys. Then we discovered that boys and girls too, when they are little older, get hair down there. Uuuuhhhhgh, I don`t want hair there! (though luck kiddo, but even getting lost in the forest has it`s avails, just be careful not to evolve fauna with the flora). Then we passed on a sexual maturity, with her real question: „What are they selling in a sex shop?“. BOOM,  BANG,  BAM, WHAM….. Excuse me?!?!?!?!?….And there goes child innocently explaining that her and her little friend saw the other day one of these shops and they wanted to get in because they can`t figure out what things are actually offered in a such a place. Weeeeeell, hmmmmmmm, you seeeeee, I meaaaaaaan, the people buuuuuuy, ahmmmmmmm…that….pretty-underwear-and-other-things-which-now-would-be-very-boring-to-you-and-for-which-some-adults-think-they-should-buy-it-to-their-sweethearts-with-whom-they-make-love-to-love-each-other-even-more. HA! Next question, please! Quickly! (….son of the…how in the world do they know about the dildo?!?!?!?)

And the she hits me with the next one: why do we have to avoid the sun when we get the period? „. What?????? Who said that???? Her mamma told her, she says, and after it she also said that when they get their period girls must avoid sun at all costs because then they bleed twice as much so now she is wondering what she shoud do during the summer?

To hell with her dim uneducated mother! What kind of nonsense is this?!? No sweety, that ain`t right. You don`t have to hide in caves when you get your period, nothing bad is going to happen, mummy just didn`t get it right. „Oooooh“, she says, „ and can`t you tell me why boys don`t cry?“ And there goes an intervention again, of course they cry, every normal man cries when he feels bad, you know, just like us, when they are sad, angry, or both. Even daddy cries sometimes. And your adored cousin Paul. „But my mom told me that real men don`t cry, ever!“. That mom of yours is a walking idiot, I`m thinking…What else did your mamma say?  „Weeeeell“, she goes “mom said that girls which are changing boys are whores and the boys that are no good are fags.“

 

Can you bealive it!?! But the kid had more of it: that she has to dress „well“ when she is going to the beach because nobody mustn`t see her tities (which tities?!? You`re 8, about which tities are speaking about?!?) or her tush, God forbid (what that she has to wear on the beach, a raincoat?). Then she said that depilation is very painful, that you have to hide from everyone when you have your period…. Incredible. That narrow minded mother of hers will make a a sexually deviant person, like she is, which won`t be able to love herself, or her future partner, or be capable to enjoy sex freely. Because that is disgusting.  All that. Including all the male population.

Then we are speaking about some programmes against discriminations and prejudices. Then you can hear us complaining that men are disrespecting us. No, no, my dear, you got it all wrong. Women are doing it, mostly, raising new generations of frustrated idiots of both sexes which just can`t embrace something normal, like their own bodies, delights and sincere love, labeling it like general shame and sin. Incredible. In this time and age…

 

P.S. what that mother needs is a genuine kick with a mace. Maybe, just maybe, then she would understand how backward she really is and let her child grow up in a happy and satisfied person.

 

 

Marrrrrrrriage. Sounds scary sometimes.

But if something is even more scarier, that is the divorce. And it`s consequences. But now, not to wake the awful dark demons, we will fast forward a little bit. Into the period when the divorce is already far far gone. At least it should be.

Regarding it, there`s a one tiny winy detail that I`m bothered with: why some women keep their old husband`s last name?

For example, you had a bad divorce. And I mean really ugly. This is not an exception, people are really rarely separated as friends, truely wishing him/her all best. It sounds almost…utopian. Most women just freeze and obscure when someone even mentions their Ex, and they usually „tagg“ him/her the prefixes like: jerk, idiot, moron, bitch, retard, weasel, loser, bastard….you get the picture. They can`t stand him.

But…they are still walking around with his last name. The name of the same person which they despise and hate.

Therefore I ask – why in the name of God?

If you already hate every particle of his being, you are disgusted of his every trace, why are you still stack with his name? What „drives“ this masochistic need to keep it, not to throw away that stinky garb with which you are cloaked, which you attire every morning then snort with your nose on his smell?

If we think about that „nomen est omen“, what is this telling about you? Your name is a very important thing, we are connecting with it, many studies are made proving the impact of letters and words on our life. People are spending years on therapies for that same strong words which have marked their lives. But THIS name – you are not touching. Why is that? After all that…massacre of divorce, why don`t you change it with some that is only yours and which doesn`t connect you with that odious person and all the suffering you had with it?

Why? For some provincial belief that the divorcee is a damaged good? Socially labeled as defected? C`mon! Get real!

I remembered another situation, the one when He had married again, and the „New wife“ have taken that same last name. I know a very succsessful, educated and very beautiful woman, which is „sticked“ on that New One, bitching about her all the time. Why? Because she thinks that she is The Mrs K. Herself, not the second one. And that she is the only entitled to „use“ this name. Because she was the first. The time is flying by, the Ex and the New one, already have their own baby, but the First one doesn`t gives up. A-a. She is Mrs K. Tones of stupid situations are filling up, the situations in which she has to explain that she is no longer Mr.K`s wife, that she has nothing to do with the certain matter or event, after all – she is a lady, a completly other person and…. But she still stays connected with that man on which she exhausting all her bitterness and venom. Whyyyyyyyyyy????

For the Shakespearean conviction that the rose would smell different? Bullsh*t!!! Even there, the good man Will have clearly showed us that the name IS important. Why, I ask, why don`t you take your maiden name, or some completly new, and after all that suffering grant yourself with a new spring time? The one where everything is waking up, where the world has pure clear colours, interesting sweet scents…The one where new day brings the joy of new beginning, illuminated with the sun`s promise. Without ugly shadows and heavy clouds.

Everyone has the right to make mistakes. Face it, we`re not perfect. But also, we have the right on new debuts, without dragging other people`s bulk on our backs. You know, the right on that easy, uncertain beginnings, without ugly prefixes and suffixes.

Except maybe for the pure adrenalin of the true spring „fix“.

Because you deserve it, vol. 4.